I'LL Trick 'Em with Tissue"

People asked me if I would continue dating post-mastectomy, and if so, how would I tell a man about my operation.  It has been amusing to experience men's reactions when I tell them I'm missing a boob.  The look on their faces is priceless.  100% of the men have been shocked.

I've had the opportunity to share stories with other cancer survivors.  Some have supportive husbands and boyfriends.  While others have found themselves alone on their journey to recovery. 

Included in my mastectomy package was a consultation with a plastic surgeon.  He was shocked when I politely said "no" to the reconstruction surgery.  I was unwilling to risk my life for a perfect set of boobs.  (The risk was very high because of my past surgeries and high dosages of radiation.)  

If a man's main focus is on a female's anatomy, then it is not worth pursuing a relationship.  I share some of my feelings with this poem.  Enjoy! 

"I'll Trick 'Em with Tissue"

            by

  Sandra Fernandez-Henderson (2/29/2014)

"Listen up, Ladies!

I have something important for you to hear.

To the schmuck who left

because of the mastectomy,

"I hope roaches crap in your beer!"

Ladies, it is not worth it

to shed even a tear

for a guy who cannot value

all you are worth.

As I told that schmuck,

"Kiss me where the sun cannot shine.

Me and my dog will be more than fine." 

I admit, I can be a bit crass.

I am much more than a set of perfect 38's.

I'm a self-sufficient, smart, deserving,

sensuous lass

who deserves a man who appreciates her inner fire.

A man who, in spite of her missing boobs,

still has the desire

to fill her life with memorable days,

Who is able to show in numerous ways

that inner beauty is what truly matters.

A man who sizzles her life with passion;

Who accepts her chest tattoos as a

new fashion.

A man who appreciates her pizzazz,

and knows she has

more than a body to share.

A man who is willing to caress her bare

skin with all the scars.

Until then, I'll stuff my bra with tissue.

And if a guy cannot accept me without any tits,

I'll smile while I walk away and say,

"Your loss!  You can kiss my grits!"